"Growing Your People Monthly" Newsletter

April 2009

Greetings!

Often, when I work with clients, they remark, "Oh, Yvonne, you know me, I like to be in control of my ______" and insert here one of many options: projects, calendar, public image, employees, etc. It is important to be honest with yourself and others and truly understand the intentions behind your behavior. What is the true message behind your need for control? How does this impact your professional success and working relationships? Learn more in this month's newsletter!

Be Well,
Yvonne Kinney-Hockert
National Speaker, Business Consultant & Coach
Consulting Solutions, LLC.

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Have a Control Conversation With Yourself

Many leaders express their desire to maintain control over various aspects of their professional role. "I'm the only one that has the dedication to lead these projects." "No one knows about or cares about this like I do." "I need to ensure the continued positive reputation of my company." "This is just who I am." "I'll rest easier if I know it's completed."

Well, rest assured, while these statements sound logical and seem to represent good intentions, in reality, they often result in self-defeating behavior like micro-managing, withholding information, or stifling others' growth. Regardless of the size of your company, from small business to larger corporation, the ability or inability to empower others is a determining factor for advancement, growth and professional success.

It is important for leaders to understand the true intentions behind their control statements. The need for control can be based on many factors, including:

• Fear of Appearing Weak in knowledge or skills - it's the age-old notion that you might be afraid of having a direct report more skilled than yourself, or you are worried you will be exposed as lacking knowledge or even miss-managing.

• Inability to Delegate - You may feel lost when it comes to knowing how to delegate, or you are feeling so overwhelmed yourself that even the thought of empowering others seems impossible to handle.

• Desire to be in the spotlight - Perhaps you have a strong internal drive for recognition, possibly to the point that you refuse to share credit for successful outcomes.

As a business leader, it is key to have accurate expectations based on clear intentions, and this often requires an honest "conversation" with yourself and then being accountable to the truth behind the statements. Susan Scott addresses this beautifully in her book, Fierce Conversations: Achieving Success at Work and in Life, One Conversation at a Time, when she says: "You must deliberately, purposely come out from behind yourself into the conversation and make it real-at least your part of it."

Being honest with yourself gives you a clear picture of your professional reality and thus enables you to set realistic goals and be responsive to change. Have that honest conversation and truly realize your potential! Don't know where to begin? Try starting here!

Your Call To Action. . .